Just over a year ago, magistrate and former counsellor, Elaine Gordon, was inspired to start a social group for lonely older people after entertaining a friend and her 98-year-old mother.

Many people were still nervous about going out following the Covid pandemic, but with persistence, care, and attention to detail Elaine, 69, managed to bring together around 20 older people who now benefit from regular free tea parties and other events in Bowdon, Greater Manchester.

The Hale Tea Cakes group has just held its eighteenth get together at the Jubilee Community Centre. Recently, the guests, whose ages range from the late 70s to the mid-90s, were entertained by the seven-strong Mad Hatters, a group of older musicians who tag themselves the ‘Oldest Boy Band on the Block.’

“Everyone loved it,” said Elaine. “They were all singing along to hits from the 50s and 60s. This sort of occasion really brings people together.”

When Elaine decided to start the group she ‘recruited’ the older people by talking to staff at local GP surgeries, distributing flyers, and posting on social media. She also built a team of eight hosts, who oversee the events, and an equal number of volunteer drivers. And she visits every older person who joins the group to ‘get a picture of who they are and how they live.’

She was moved to set up the group after a friend and her mother visited her.

“It was just an arrangement where I invited them both for a sandwich and cake but it meant so much to them.” said Elaine. “So when I heard about Re-engage I thought I’d like to do it more long term and for more people.

“My parents were divorced and both lonely when they got older and although I visited them and took them out I never quite understood their loneliness. But I do now. And that’s why I believe it’s so important to do what we can to help people in that situation.

“I really enjoy the tea parties. They are very rewarding for me and for the volunteers. They can be hard work because you have to be aware of so many things. What might seem like a small detail is very important. For example, an older person might not be able to get into a low seat of a volunteer’s car.

“But it’s all worth it. It’s gratifying to see how much pleasure they get from the tea parties. They really look forward to them. A lot of them do have families but they like to have something outside of that, and our social events fit the bill perfectly. 

“The volunteers are absolutely tremendous and really get involved. Some even come along to the community centre when they’re not on duty. Quite a few friendships have been forged.”

Ruth Aaron, 90, who has been attending the events since Hale Tea Cakes started, has been on her own since her husband Ronnie died in 2021. They had been married for nearly 65 years. 

“I really look forward to going to the get togethers,” said Ruth. “They are really enjoyable and Elaine is the kindest, most thoughtful person I’ve ever met.

“She never stops organising things and takes great care with everyone. She is a superb lady, absolutely fantastic.

“The Mad Hatters day was terrific. Everyone had a great time and it was especially good because everyone there was so friendly.”